I started today feeling tired but quite sure that I would be happy and confident in due time.
and then I saw you...dammit.
I had not expected you to be there, particularly since you told me you never liked church. In a way I felt it to be a safe haven. Stupid to convince myself that I'd never see you again. Of course I would. We have too many things in common. What did I feel? I have no idea and it frustrates me that I cannot properly express my emotions. How old am I? five? Ridiculous. I know that I did the right thing and I know that anything I may still feel is simply due to missing what we did have. I don't truly feel those things anymore, even if I wish I did.
Is there guilt, shame, regret lingering? Its possible there are those things here and there but for the most part I am at a loss of words. Blank in describing precisely what I think of you.
My dog is laying on my floor and I feel rejected. Lovely end to my day.
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